Friday, March 30, 2007
你要我說多難堪
我根本不想分開
為什麼還要我用微笑來帶過
我沒有這種天份
包容你也接受他
不用擔心的太多
我會一直好好過
你已經遠遠離開
我也會慢慢走開
為什麼我連分開都遷就著你
我真的沒有天份
安靜的沒這麼快
我會學著放棄你
是因為我太愛你
我根本不想分開
為什麼還要我用微笑來帶過
我沒有這種天份
包容你也接受他
不用擔心的太多
我會一直好好過
你已經遠遠離開
我也會慢慢走開
為什麼我連分開都遷就著你
我真的沒有天份
安靜的沒這麼快
我會學著放棄你
是因為我太愛你
what we could have been, 15:22.
SHIT LA.
i forgot to tap card in the morning -.-
came to school at 830am, put my bag down, log in to my comp and totally forgot to tap my damn card!! die liao loh. no more 100% attendance ):
someone shoot me.
i forgot to tap card in the morning -.-
came to school at 830am, put my bag down, log in to my comp and totally forgot to tap my damn card!! die liao loh. no more 100% attendance ):
someone shoot me.
what we could have been, 09:23.
Thursday, March 29, 2007
we cabbed from school to paragon at 3pm and cabbed back to sch at 4pm.
just to accompany that boy to get his 2 adidas jackets
and, i picked one of them (: im proud of it and i hope he likes it too.
he bought his green one around this time last year as well.
actually, he bought a black n white one but changed it to green on my birthDay itself. 1 year ago feels so much like just yesterday.
dinner with nic and alwyn at ambushed. is it ambushed? or ambush? whatever, its just inside taka.
of course pastacafe's standard is better. they have Smoked salmon pasta!
nic bought a vest that costs so much, its 90cents more than a guess wallet!
haha. but it looked nice. and im broke.
darlings, my birthday is seriously around the corner!
*SUPER HUGE HINT* haha.
i love surprises too! from special ppl.
just to accompany that boy to get his 2 adidas jackets
and, i picked one of them (: im proud of it and i hope he likes it too.
he bought his green one around this time last year as well.
actually, he bought a black n white one but changed it to green on my birthDay itself. 1 year ago feels so much like just yesterday.
dinner with nic and alwyn at ambushed. is it ambushed? or ambush? whatever, its just inside taka.
of course pastacafe's standard is better. they have Smoked salmon pasta!
nic bought a vest that costs so much, its 90cents more than a guess wallet!
haha. but it looked nice. and im broke.
darlings, my birthday is seriously around the corner!
*SUPER HUGE HINT* haha.
i love surprises too! from special ppl.
what we could have been, 01:53.
Wednesday, March 28, 2007
COLORGENICS.
Your Complete Personal Profile.
You are tending to pursue your objectives with concentrated intensity and it would seem that whatever obstacles may come into your path, you will stick to your guns and will not allow yourself to be deflected from your purpose. You are striving to achieve recognition and what is more - you deserve it.
You are totally dissatisfied with your present situation. Matters are not going right for you and you are seeking a means of escape. Your mental state of mind necessitates that you need to change your thinking patterns. Remember, if one particular modus operandi doesn't seem to work, then try something different.
You feel very lonely and frustrated at this time but your shyness and modesty precludes you from establishing any deep form of relationship. You feel rather isolated and alone. You are egocentric and you believe that you are always right - well maybe you are - but you have a short fuse and are likely to take offence for the slightest reason.
You are pretending that the situation around you doesn't matter, but the effort of trying to conceal your emotions and anxieties is resulting in untold stress. The existing situation is disagreeable. You feel unwanted and lonely and you would really like to associate with someone whose ideals are as high as your own. You want to be above the standard of mediocrity and this need to be needed and that need to need has almost become an obsession. You are trying to magnify the need into a compelling urge. You would really like to tell the world how great you are but no, you are holding back because you feel that your peers may treat you with contempt. This is a great pity because you have in fact a unique quality of character, but the continual restraint that you impose on yourself makes you suppress this need for others and you pretend you don't really care. You treat those who criticise you with contempt. However, to be honest, beneath this assumption of indifference you really long for the approval and esteem of others.
You really like doing what you do and, more than that, you like yourself. Your attitude to work and to life is that 'If its not fun - then don't do it'. You want to be liked and respected, not for who you are but for what you are - and it seems to be working.
haha, some of it seems true.
but why did it sound like ive got damn low selfesteem ! ):
try it out here
Your Complete Personal Profile.
You are tending to pursue your objectives with concentrated intensity and it would seem that whatever obstacles may come into your path, you will stick to your guns and will not allow yourself to be deflected from your purpose. You are striving to achieve recognition and what is more - you deserve it.
You are totally dissatisfied with your present situation. Matters are not going right for you and you are seeking a means of escape. Your mental state of mind necessitates that you need to change your thinking patterns. Remember, if one particular modus operandi doesn't seem to work, then try something different.
You feel very lonely and frustrated at this time but your shyness and modesty precludes you from establishing any deep form of relationship. You feel rather isolated and alone. You are egocentric and you believe that you are always right - well maybe you are - but you have a short fuse and are likely to take offence for the slightest reason.
You are pretending that the situation around you doesn't matter, but the effort of trying to conceal your emotions and anxieties is resulting in untold stress. The existing situation is disagreeable. You feel unwanted and lonely and you would really like to associate with someone whose ideals are as high as your own. You want to be above the standard of mediocrity and this need to be needed and that need to need has almost become an obsession. You are trying to magnify the need into a compelling urge. You would really like to tell the world how great you are but no, you are holding back because you feel that your peers may treat you with contempt. This is a great pity because you have in fact a unique quality of character, but the continual restraint that you impose on yourself makes you suppress this need for others and you pretend you don't really care. You treat those who criticise you with contempt. However, to be honest, beneath this assumption of indifference you really long for the approval and esteem of others.
You really like doing what you do and, more than that, you like yourself. Your attitude to work and to life is that 'If its not fun - then don't do it'. You want to be liked and respected, not for who you are but for what you are - and it seems to be working.
haha, some of it seems true.
but why did it sound like ive got damn low selfesteem ! ):
try it out here
what we could have been, 01:35.
Tuesday, March 27, 2007
i, have deleted as many entries as possible.
and i still seriously think i have a split personality mental thing. haha. no, im not dangerous.
i always feel more calm and happier at night and on most weekends these days.
there's really only one explaination, i just chose to believe i have another me living inside this body =D
*watch too much Heroes alr.lol
since i deleted entries,
my whole weekend was spent with my mom! except sunday. cause my dad came back from his company cruise alr. the whole family was supposed to go but i think the company like, over charge other ppl they brought along. and its a cruise to nowhere, so no point.
shopping and lunch at jap restaurant on saturday with my mom (:
it was so fun. she was going on bout daddy's not in town so its time we spent his money while he's away! haha. and so i bought $103 of things from f21! lovely.
sat in starbucks for a really long time and then took 105 from lido back to tpy while munching on "gao luk"s.
my mom's just the only person who can just about read my mind and know what's happening without me telling her. and she just notices things but just doesnt say much. like the ring. i think we need a lot more mother-daughter time like when i was in primary school.
and today, i had cramps again.
i was in soo much pain, i couldnt stand or walk or even sit up straight, everything would turn white. ive lost count of how many times cramps like that has happened to me. rh cabbed me home, thankfully. i'd thought i would have to get home on my own in so much pain. reached home and passed out on the floor.
and when i woke up, it didnt hurt so much anymore. its like i resurrected.
and now, im tired.
good night world.
p.s thanks shirleen (:
and i still seriously think i have a split personality mental thing. haha. no, im not dangerous.
i always feel more calm and happier at night and on most weekends these days.
there's really only one explaination, i just chose to believe i have another me living inside this body =D
*watch too much Heroes alr.lol
since i deleted entries,
my whole weekend was spent with my mom! except sunday. cause my dad came back from his company cruise alr. the whole family was supposed to go but i think the company like, over charge other ppl they brought along. and its a cruise to nowhere, so no point.
shopping and lunch at jap restaurant on saturday with my mom (:
it was so fun. she was going on bout daddy's not in town so its time we spent his money while he's away! haha. and so i bought $103 of things from f21! lovely.
sat in starbucks for a really long time and then took 105 from lido back to tpy while munching on "gao luk"s.
my mom's just the only person who can just about read my mind and know what's happening without me telling her. and she just notices things but just doesnt say much. like the ring. i think we need a lot more mother-daughter time like when i was in primary school.
and today, i had cramps again.
i was in soo much pain, i couldnt stand or walk or even sit up straight, everything would turn white. ive lost count of how many times cramps like that has happened to me. rh cabbed me home, thankfully. i'd thought i would have to get home on my own in so much pain. reached home and passed out on the floor.
and when i woke up, it didnt hurt so much anymore. its like i resurrected.
and now, im tired.
good night world.
p.s thanks shirleen (:
what we could have been, 02:11.
Friday, March 23, 2007
Love, is always patient and kind, it is never jealous.
Love is never boastful nor conceited
It is never rude or selfish
It does not take offence
It is not resentful.
Love takes no pleasure in other people's sins but delights in the truth
It is always ready to excuse, to trust, to hope and to endure whatever comes.
well, yeah, except that it is part of being human to feel jealous.
i havent met a single person who hasnt felt jealousy or envy at all.
(i dont know where that quote came from, i was just inspired by a walk to remember, i just watched it Again! haha)
to excuse, trust, hope and endure whatever comes, b...
if only he told me everything earlier, this wont have happened.
ive lost the one person i thought could really trust.
how long is this pain gonna last.
Love is never boastful nor conceited
It is never rude or selfish
It does not take offence
It is not resentful.
Love takes no pleasure in other people's sins but delights in the truth
It is always ready to excuse, to trust, to hope and to endure whatever comes.
well, yeah, except that it is part of being human to feel jealous.
i havent met a single person who hasnt felt jealousy or envy at all.
(i dont know where that quote came from, i was just inspired by a walk to remember, i just watched it Again! haha)
to excuse, trust, hope and endure whatever comes, b...
if only he told me everything earlier, this wont have happened.
ive lost the one person i thought could really trust.
how long is this pain gonna last.
what we could have been, 14:06.
Tuesday, March 20, 2007
results will be out tmr.
i am terrified.
and i cant wait till my birthday.
we have a promise.
but i can wait for it. cause if it comes so quickly, it'll end as quickly as it came. it'll be so much harder. and i wonder if i'd get presents. haha
and im saving up to buy myself a present (:
i wanna start doing it soon.
and one of my birthdays in the future would be buying myself a car. or a house (: just dont know when. altho i had a friend who had hers all planned out. when she reached 30, she'd get herself some really expensive watch or ring or something. haha.
it is very hard to get used to getting so much less attention from the one person you've been getting all the attention from for almost 2years and then suddenly not get any at all.
i am terrified.
and i cant wait till my birthday.
we have a promise.
but i can wait for it. cause if it comes so quickly, it'll end as quickly as it came. it'll be so much harder. and i wonder if i'd get presents. haha
and im saving up to buy myself a present (:
i wanna start doing it soon.
and one of my birthdays in the future would be buying myself a car. or a house (: just dont know when. altho i had a friend who had hers all planned out. when she reached 30, she'd get herself some really expensive watch or ring or something. haha.
it is very hard to get used to getting so much less attention from the one person you've been getting all the attention from for almost 2years and then suddenly not get any at all.
what we could have been, 23:43.
Saturday, March 17, 2007
everytime youre not around, i'd actually feel angry at you. how could you do this to me and all the reasons you gave were really outrageous. i was so close to even hating you. but i cant ven bring myself to do any of that when youre around.
none of the guys and girls, that ive talked to when i felt low, could understand why the hell you did it.
im not getting the closure i need to move on and not get back to square-fucking-1 every so often.
i met up with colleen for a movie and some shopping.
stomp the yard.
that darling gf bought a really cute ribbon ring for me,
she says its to replace the other ring i took off (:
shopped at topshop, and cause of my indecisiveness, i didnt get the top that i really liked in the end. cause i fig, i had to save some cash for my birthday. i dont have a bf who loves me enough to pay for anything for me anymore.
to think he used to tell me that he didnt like taking money from a girl.
he could actually be a total gentleman infront of other girls, and i guess to him, its really no point doing anything extra for me anymore.
i met neshvin after that.
with his gf and other friend, ashyok(spelling)?
it really took some time to warm up with them. but fun ppl they were. had beer, and then i tried sheesha! for the first time.
it wasnt that fantastic wad. just being able to blow loads of smoke out and look like youre smoking a ciggie! =.=
ashyok is 24. he has a car! so i got a free ride home (:
none of the guys and girls, that ive talked to when i felt low, could understand why the hell you did it.
im not getting the closure i need to move on and not get back to square-fucking-1 every so often.
i met up with colleen for a movie and some shopping.
stomp the yard.
that darling gf bought a really cute ribbon ring for me,
she says its to replace the other ring i took off (:
shopped at topshop, and cause of my indecisiveness, i didnt get the top that i really liked in the end. cause i fig, i had to save some cash for my birthday. i dont have a bf who loves me enough to pay for anything for me anymore.
to think he used to tell me that he didnt like taking money from a girl.
he could actually be a total gentleman infront of other girls, and i guess to him, its really no point doing anything extra for me anymore.
i met neshvin after that.
with his gf and other friend, ashyok(spelling)?
it really took some time to warm up with them. but fun ppl they were. had beer, and then i tried sheesha! for the first time.
it wasnt that fantastic wad. just being able to blow loads of smoke out and look like youre smoking a ciggie! =.=
ashyok is 24. he has a car! so i got a free ride home (:
what we could have been, 23:43.
Friday, March 16, 2007
Now that it's all said and done,
I can't believe you were the one
To build me up and tear me down,
Like an old abandoned house.
What you said when you left
Just left me cold and out of breath.
I fell too far, was in way too deep.
Guess i let you get the best of me.
Forget, I’m not sure I could
They say time heals everything
But I’m still waiting
I can't believe you were the one
To build me up and tear me down,
Like an old abandoned house.
What you said when you left
Just left me cold and out of breath.
I fell too far, was in way too deep.
Guess i let you get the best of me.
Forget, I’m not sure I could
They say time heals everything
But I’m still waiting
what we could have been, 08:59.
Thursday, March 15, 2007
You used to talk to me like
I was the only one around.
You used to lean on me like
The only other choice was falling down.
You used to walk with me like
We had nowhere we needed to go,
Nice and slow, to no place in particular.
I used to reach for you when
I got lost along the way.
I used to listen.
You always had just the right thing to say.
I used to follow you.
Never really cared where we would go,
Fast or slow, to anywhere at all.
We used to have this figured out;
We used to breathe without a doubt.
When nights were clear, you were the first star that I'd see.
We used to have this under control.
We never thought.
We used to know.
At least there's you, and at least there's me.
Can we get this back?
Can we get this back to how it used to be?
I look around me,
And I want you to be there
'Cause I miss the things that we shared.
Look around you.
It's empty, and you're sad
'Cause you miss the love that we had.
Chris Daughtry.
I was the only one around.
You used to lean on me like
The only other choice was falling down.
You used to walk with me like
We had nowhere we needed to go,
Nice and slow, to no place in particular.
I used to reach for you when
I got lost along the way.
I used to listen.
You always had just the right thing to say.
I used to follow you.
Never really cared where we would go,
Fast or slow, to anywhere at all.
We used to have this figured out;
We used to breathe without a doubt.
When nights were clear, you were the first star that I'd see.
We used to have this under control.
We never thought.
We used to know.
At least there's you, and at least there's me.
Can we get this back?
Can we get this back to how it used to be?
I look around me,
And I want you to be there
'Cause I miss the things that we shared.
Look around you.
It's empty, and you're sad
'Cause you miss the love that we had.
Chris Daughtry.
what we could have been, 09:51.
Tuesday, March 13, 2007
loooong tag.
i feel like shifting to livejournal.
but i dont wanna abandon this blog and livejournal's still kinda confusing ):
im walking out of misery.
my appetite's coming back.
but im still deluding myself.
i regretted doing many things but one thing i dont regret is that my friends really have been here for me just when i needed them most.
you werent dirt at all. you just didnt give me another chance.
i will always be here.
i feel like shifting to livejournal.
but i dont wanna abandon this blog and livejournal's still kinda confusing ):
im walking out of misery.
my appetite's coming back.
but im still deluding myself.
i regretted doing many things but one thing i dont regret is that my friends really have been here for me just when i needed them most.
you werent dirt at all. you just didnt give me another chance.
i will always be here.
what we could have been, 21:36.
Sunday, March 11, 2007
i cant help but continue thinking if one day you'd come back.
20mths of what we shared cant be gone so quickly.
i can care less about anon ppl reading alr.
just pls dont be sucha fag and not write your name down.
learn from fiona herself or something.
300.
loads of blood and some nudity but a damn good movie.
everyone should watch it. everyone above the age of 18, should watch it.
the ever first war movie i love.
and i admire the love between Spartan king Leonidas and his queen. so strong.
i'd thought ours was pretty strong too. thought...
if i had that big of spartan blood in me, i'd be as strong as the women there, namely the queen. but i feel like toufu. fuck.
20mths of what we shared cant be gone so quickly.
i can care less about anon ppl reading alr.
just pls dont be sucha fag and not write your name down.
learn from fiona herself or something.
300.
loads of blood and some nudity but a damn good movie.
everyone should watch it. everyone above the age of 18, should watch it.
the ever first war movie i love.
and i admire the love between Spartan king Leonidas and his queen. so strong.
i'd thought ours was pretty strong too. thought...
if i had that big of spartan blood in me, i'd be as strong as the women there, namely the queen. but i feel like toufu. fuck.
what we could have been, 23:41.
baby baby baby dont leave me
please dont leave me all by myself
ive got this burning, burning yearning feeling inside me
deep inside me and it hurts so bad
you came into my heart so tenderly
with the burning love that stings like a bee
and now that i surrender so helplessly
you now wanna leave, you wanna leave me
-
I was blown away
What could I say
It all seemed to make sense.
You've taken away everything
And I can't deal with that.
I try to see the good in life.
But good things in life are hard to find.
I'll blow it away, blow it away
Can we make this something good?
(Well I'll try to do to it right this time around)
Let's start over,
Try to do it right this time around
It's not over
Cause a part of me is dead and in the ground.
This love is killin me
But you're the only one
It's not over.
My life with you means everything
So I won't give up that easily
I'll blow it away, blow it away
Can we make this something good?
Cause it's all misunderstood
-
Now, don't just walk away
Pretending everything's ok
And you don't care about me
And I know there's just no use
When all your lies become your truths
You took all there was to take,
And left with an empty plate
And you don't care about it, yeah.
Do you really have everything you want?
You can't run away from yourself
Could you look me in the eye?
and tell me that you`re happy now,
Would you tell it to my face or have i been erased,
are you happy now?
please dont leave me all by myself
ive got this burning, burning yearning feeling inside me
deep inside me and it hurts so bad
you came into my heart so tenderly
with the burning love that stings like a bee
and now that i surrender so helplessly
you now wanna leave, you wanna leave me
-
I was blown away
What could I say
It all seemed to make sense.
You've taken away everything
And I can't deal with that.
I try to see the good in life.
But good things in life are hard to find.
I'll blow it away, blow it away
Can we make this something good?
(Well I'll try to do to it right this time around)
Let's start over,
Try to do it right this time around
It's not over
Cause a part of me is dead and in the ground.
This love is killin me
But you're the only one
It's not over.
My life with you means everything
So I won't give up that easily
I'll blow it away, blow it away
Can we make this something good?
Cause it's all misunderstood
-
Now, don't just walk away
Pretending everything's ok
And you don't care about me
And I know there's just no use
When all your lies become your truths
You took all there was to take,
And left with an empty plate
And you don't care about it, yeah.
Do you really have everything you want?
You can't run away from yourself
Could you look me in the eye?
and tell me that you`re happy now,
Would you tell it to my face or have i been erased,
are you happy now?
what we could have been, 18:14.
懂得讓我微笑的人
再沒有誰比你有天份
輕易闖進我的心門
明天的美夢你完成
整個宇宙 浩瀚無邊的盡頭
每顆渺小星球 全都繞著你走
愛我 非你莫屬
我只願 守護 由你給我的幸福
愛我 非你莫屬
也許會 笑著哭 但那人是你所以 不怕苦
懂得讓我流淚的人
給的感動一定是最深
在我心中留下傷痕
你同時點亮了星辰
看 那麼多相遇
偏偏只和你 天造地設般產生奇蹟
哦 我心的縫隙
我想除了你 任誰也無法填補這空虛
再沒有誰比你有天份
輕易闖進我的心門
明天的美夢你完成
整個宇宙 浩瀚無邊的盡頭
每顆渺小星球 全都繞著你走
愛我 非你莫屬
我只願 守護 由你給我的幸福
愛我 非你莫屬
也許會 笑著哭 但那人是你所以 不怕苦
懂得讓我流淚的人
給的感動一定是最深
在我心中留下傷痕
你同時點亮了星辰
哦 我心的縫隙
我想除了你 任誰也無法填補這空虛
what we could have been, 18:00.
Saturday, March 10, 2007
看着右手 被撕裂的伤口
爱好像曾经停留
而我左手 按下号码之后
那酋属于我 的歌不再播送
默写你的爱过 坦承自己脆弱
对白怎么说 表情才不难过
我想要说 我想要说
如果没有了你 我该如何往下走
那一秒钟 有没有发现我 倔强里的问候
怎么劝我放手 在这一切之后
整夜的风 冷得我手颤抖
你在温暖的那头
熟悉路口 再一次的路过
等在那角落 的人已不是我
i am getting tired of empty promises you've made and never kept.
but why do i love you so.
i started reading all my chat logs with you baby.
i miss you so much. so very much.
爱好像曾经停留
而我左手 按下号码之后
那酋属于我 的歌不再播送
默写你的爱过 坦承自己脆弱
对白怎么说 表情才不难过
我想要说 我想要说
如果没有了你 我该如何往下走
那一秒钟 有没有发现我 倔强里的问候
怎么劝我放手 在这一切之后
整夜的风 冷得我手颤抖
你在温暖的那头
熟悉路口 再一次的路过
等在那角落 的人已不是我
i am getting tired of empty promises you've made and never kept.
but why do i love you so.
i started reading all my chat logs with you baby.
i miss you so much. so very much.
what we could have been, 22:04.
i stayed with you when you needed me most.
when como died. when so many things happened, you told me not to leave you. i didnt.
why couldnt you stay with me this time when i told you to stay?
everyone else around me are just so sweet. so caring.
my primary school friends, such darlings i met up with them today. they did all they could to cheer me up but i was feeling damn low at that time.
everyone. even my parents who only thinks im really stressed and tired, are bringing me to the movies and getting my a new HD. my mom was super nice to me the entire week. gz made me realise how much i have to start cherishing everyone around me.
but the one person that could make me feel all good again doesnt wanna give a shit about me right now. it hurts so bad. i get the impression from him that make me think he doesnt want to be best friends altho he said he wanted, he's keeping his distance. he changed his msn password. and refuses to tell me the new one. nvm.
all he could say to that was, sorry. and, i told you i am bad.
and i happen to be so in love with you how could you just leave like that.
and he's going back on his word. all the things we agreed on, he's not doing it anymore. cause of reputation, according to him. the ppl im around with, my friends from sec sch, as close friends, we really are that close. for girls. guys and girls of course not that close. but remember liz, larry, daryl and the rest of the gang.
and he's supposed to be the best friend. get it? if not then nvm.
and its just the little things like hanging on his arm/elbow. ive been doing that since i was a kid, to my mom. somehow i feel safer when walking. and hugs. we've done so many things before just little things like that, he cant agree on now but could just a few days ago.
i cant think of what other feelings to type out.
so confused.
but i love this song nicole sent me,
i love you baby. i still do. and you know how much it is. i feel like im never gonna get over you. but i look forward to our very last date when i can feel you once again for the very last time. after that, i really dont know what im gonna do without you.
when como died. when so many things happened, you told me not to leave you. i didnt.
why couldnt you stay with me this time when i told you to stay?
everyone else around me are just so sweet. so caring.
my primary school friends, such darlings i met up with them today. they did all they could to cheer me up but i was feeling damn low at that time.
everyone. even my parents who only thinks im really stressed and tired, are bringing me to the movies and getting my a new HD. my mom was super nice to me the entire week. gz made me realise how much i have to start cherishing everyone around me.
but the one person that could make me feel all good again doesnt wanna give a shit about me right now. it hurts so bad. i get the impression from him that make me think he doesnt want to be best friends altho he said he wanted, he's keeping his distance. he changed his msn password. and refuses to tell me the new one. nvm.
all he could say to that was, sorry. and, i told you i am bad.
and i happen to be so in love with you how could you just leave like that.
and he's going back on his word. all the things we agreed on, he's not doing it anymore. cause of reputation, according to him. the ppl im around with, my friends from sec sch, as close friends, we really are that close. for girls. guys and girls of course not that close. but remember liz, larry, daryl and the rest of the gang.
and he's supposed to be the best friend. get it? if not then nvm.
and its just the little things like hanging on his arm/elbow. ive been doing that since i was a kid, to my mom. somehow i feel safer when walking. and hugs. we've done so many things before just little things like that, he cant agree on now but could just a few days ago.
i cant think of what other feelings to type out.
so confused.
but i love this song nicole sent me,
2am and she calls me 'cause I'm still awake,
"can you help me unravel my latest mistake,
I don't love him, winter just wasn't my season
Yeah we walk through the doors, so accusing their eyes
Like they have any right at all to criticize,
hypocrites, you're all here for the very same reason"
'Cause you can't jump the track,we're like cars on a cable
and life's like an hourglass, glued to the table
No one can find the rewind button girl,
So cradle your head in you hands
And breathe, just breathe,
2am and im still awake, writing a song
If I get it all down on paper, its no longer
inside of me, threatening the life they belong to
And i feel like I'm naked in front of the crowd
Cause these words are my diary, screaming out loud
And I know that you'll use them, however you want to
Cause you can't jump the track, we're like cars on a cable,
And life's like an hourglass, glued to the table
No one can find the rewind button now
Sing it if you understand.
and breathe, just breathe
"can you help me unravel my latest mistake,
I don't love him, winter just wasn't my season
Yeah we walk through the doors, so accusing their eyes
Like they have any right at all to criticize,
hypocrites, you're all here for the very same reason"
'Cause you can't jump the track,we're like cars on a cable
and life's like an hourglass, glued to the table
No one can find the rewind button girl,
So cradle your head in you hands
And breathe, just breathe,
2am and im still awake, writing a song
If I get it all down on paper, its no longer
inside of me, threatening the life they belong to
And i feel like I'm naked in front of the crowd
Cause these words are my diary, screaming out loud
And I know that you'll use them, however you want to
Cause you can't jump the track, we're like cars on a cable,
And life's like an hourglass, glued to the table
No one can find the rewind button now
Sing it if you understand.
and breathe, just breathe
i love you baby. i still do. and you know how much it is. i feel like im never gonna get over you. but i look forward to our very last date when i can feel you once again for the very last time. after that, i really dont know what im gonna do without you.
what we could have been, 01:21.
Tuesday, March 06, 2007
if only we could start all over again.
hi, im joanne. and you are?
all i ever did was to love you.
if time could stop when you first kissed me on the bus.
i woke up on ur shoulder feeling v surprised.
if only i could let go or get amnesia and forget the last 1yr8mths we had together.
i'd recover from the shock of you dropping the bomb on me and be happy again.
yeah, if only.
fyp and all the heartache is draining me.
total loneliness without almost my whole class and the one person i thought would always be there for me and had told me just a week before not to worry or be afraid bout yr3, i'd still have him. not anymore i dont. yeah, keep telling yourself that joanne, maybe just one day you'd learn to walk alone again.
baby, slow down. dont move so fast right now, for me pls?
new girls will kill me.
Saturday, March 3, 2007
for the girl who lost her angel...
he who really loves you, would never let you go, no matter how much you wanted to leave..
he who really loves you, would never get tired of your daily ramblings and find them very 'you'..
he who really loves you, would accept you for who you are and even if he couldnt take it, would sit down and tell you, changing you for the better..
he who really loves you, sees all your flaws and still think you're perfect..
he who really loves you, would never break your heart, no matter what he feels..
he who really loves you, would understand the time of the month is a rough patch you have to go through..
girlfriend, everything takes time.. i know roughly you feel at this point in time.. how everything reminds you of him. how wherever you go, you see him in the things around and the things that you guys have done together..
but know this sweetie, he'll be like a teardrop..
he was a part of you, when you allow the tear to fall, he comes out.. sure he will still be around, on your skin, still feeling like he's this part of you, but just a little more distant.. then as you allow time to heal you, he will evaporate and he wouldnt be the same person you knew he was.. he'd be this good friend whom you can still lean upon... this doesnt mean that you cant keep memories of him, residues remain and those are memories which you can choose to wipe away or simply let them stay etched in the back of your mind..
cry and grieve all you want now.. let everything fall down, let all your emotions through, past that exterior.. just breakdown..
but know and try my dear, you will get through this someday, with a better future and wait patiently for that someone else who will love you just the way you are.. he will find you.. make yourself feel whole first...
love, yourself..
vanessa
hi, im joanne. and you are?
all i ever did was to love you.
if time could stop when you first kissed me on the bus.
i woke up on ur shoulder feeling v surprised.
if only i could let go or get amnesia and forget the last 1yr8mths we had together.
i'd recover from the shock of you dropping the bomb on me and be happy again.
yeah, if only.
fyp and all the heartache is draining me.
total loneliness without almost my whole class and the one person i thought would always be there for me and had told me just a week before not to worry or be afraid bout yr3, i'd still have him. not anymore i dont. yeah, keep telling yourself that joanne, maybe just one day you'd learn to walk alone again.
baby, slow down. dont move so fast right now, for me pls?
new girls will kill me.
Saturday, March 3, 2007
for the girl who lost her angel...
he who really loves you, would never let you go, no matter how much you wanted to leave..
he who really loves you, would never get tired of your daily ramblings and find them very 'you'..
he who really loves you, would accept you for who you are and even if he couldnt take it, would sit down and tell you, changing you for the better..
he who really loves you, sees all your flaws and still think you're perfect..
he who really loves you, would never break your heart, no matter what he feels..
he who really loves you, would understand the time of the month is a rough patch you have to go through..
girlfriend, everything takes time.. i know roughly you feel at this point in time.. how everything reminds you of him. how wherever you go, you see him in the things around and the things that you guys have done together..
but know this sweetie, he'll be like a teardrop..
he was a part of you, when you allow the tear to fall, he comes out.. sure he will still be around, on your skin, still feeling like he's this part of you, but just a little more distant.. then as you allow time to heal you, he will evaporate and he wouldnt be the same person you knew he was.. he'd be this good friend whom you can still lean upon... this doesnt mean that you cant keep memories of him, residues remain and those are memories which you can choose to wipe away or simply let them stay etched in the back of your mind..
cry and grieve all you want now.. let everything fall down, let all your emotions through, past that exterior.. just breakdown..
but know and try my dear, you will get through this someday, with a better future and wait patiently for that someone else who will love you just the way you are.. he will find you.. make yourself feel whole first...
love, yourself..
vanessa
what we could have been, 20:43.
Sunday, March 04, 2007
thank you vanessa for dedicating that entry to me.
and the rest of you too.
我想念去年的冬天
下着雪的那一夜
你给的温柔
紧握的双手
温暖整个寒冬
失去了曾经的拥有
在你离开以后
带走了笑容
只留下寂寞
忘了幸福是什么
没有你的夜特别的漆黑
只能闭上双眼去感觉
没有我的夜谁在你身边
代替了那个从前
能不能再听一次你说爱我
回到还在你怀里的时候
能不能让我再一次拥有
曾属于我的温柔
能不能让我再一次拥有
曾属于我的温柔
suddenly there are so many songs that can actually express how i feel.
怪我不懂珍惜 把你推向他
我来不及 改变结局
这是我 自导自演的悲剧
and the rest of you too.
我想念去年的冬天
下着雪的那一夜
你给的温柔
紧握的双手
温暖整个寒冬
失去了曾经的拥有
在你离开以后
带走了笑容
只留下寂寞
忘了幸福是什么
没有你的夜特别的漆黑
只能闭上双眼去感觉
没有我的夜谁在你身边
代替了那个从前
能不能再听一次你说爱我
回到还在你怀里的时候
能不能让我再一次拥有
曾属于我的温柔
能不能让我再一次拥有
曾属于我的温柔
suddenly there are so many songs that can actually express how i feel.
怪我不懂珍惜 把你推向他
我来不及 改变结局
这是我 自导自演的悲剧
what we could have been, 18:57.
If I could escape I would but, first of all, let me say
I must apologize for acting stank and treating you this way
Cause I’ve been acting like sour milk all on the floor
It’s your fault you didn’t shut the refrigerator
Maybe that’s the reason I’ve been acting so cold?
If I could escape and recreate a place that’s my own world
And I could be your favorite girl (forever) perfectly together
Tell me boy now wouldn’t that be sweet? (sweet escape)
If I could be sweet
I know I’ve been a real bad girl (I’ll try to change)
I didn’t mean for you to get hurt (whatsoever) we can make it better
Tell me boy now wouldn’t that be sweet? (sweet escape)
I want to get away to our sweet escape
I want to get away, yeah
You held me down, I’m at my lowest boiling point
So baby, times get a little crazy, I’ve been gettin’ a little lazy
Waitin’ on you to come save me
I can see that you're angry by the way that you treat me
Hopefully you don’t leave me, wanted you with me
I must apologize for acting stank and treating you this way
Cause I’ve been acting like sour milk all on the floor
It’s your fault you didn’t shut the refrigerator
Maybe that’s the reason I’ve been acting so cold?
If I could escape and recreate a place that’s my own world
And I could be your favorite girl (forever) perfectly together
Tell me boy now wouldn’t that be sweet? (sweet escape)
If I could be sweet
I know I’ve been a real bad girl (I’ll try to change)
I didn’t mean for you to get hurt (whatsoever) we can make it better
Tell me boy now wouldn’t that be sweet? (sweet escape)
I want to get away to our sweet escape
I want to get away, yeah
You held me down, I’m at my lowest boiling point
So baby, times get a little crazy, I’ve been gettin’ a little lazy
Waitin’ on you to come save me
I can see that you're angry by the way that you treat me
Hopefully you don’t leave me, wanted you with me
what we could have been, 03:00.
作词：吴克群 作曲：吴克群
爱你行动不变 追不上你的美
脚步再快 跟不上你的嘴
分开我骗了谁 想擦掉你的脸
擦不掉痛 却更 明显
你说你要的世界 在很远 我不了解
分手就分手 别把 话说得太美 我像个残废 飞不出你的世界
借不到一点安慰 为什么你拼命后退
退到了边界 结果我没了知觉 就连痛都嫌浪费
在爱里残废 非弄得伤痕累累
累到我无力再追 最怕你突然要挽回
回到了原点 原点却又像终点 然后 多痛 一遍
爱你行动不变 追不上你的美
脚步再快 跟不上你的嘴
分开我骗了谁 想擦掉你的脸
擦不掉痛 却更 明显
你说你要的世界 在很远 我不了解
分手就分手 别把 话说得太美
我像个残废 飞不出你的世界
借不到一点安慰 为什么你拼命后退
退到了边界 结果我没了知觉 就连痛都嫌浪费
在爱里残废 非弄得伤痕累累
累到我无力再追 最怕你突然要挽回
回到了原点 原点却又像终点 然后 多痛 一遍
我像个残废 飞不出你的世界
借不到一点安慰 为什么你拼命后退
退到了边界 结果我没了知觉 就连痛都嫌浪费
在爱里残废 非弄得伤痕累累
累到我无力再追 最怕你突然要挽回
回到了原点 原点却又像终点 然后 多痛 一遍
我像个残废 在爱里残废
i'd thought we were so strong, we've been through so much.
and we still made it through together.
i'd thought nothing could break us.
now i feel this hurt would never go away.
i looked forward to your call.
but you werent feeling well. disappointment.
scroll down and read the last entry on this page.
all the memories flood back and i break down.
thats the end of my first love.
i hate vjc girls.
爱你行动不变 追不上你的美
脚步再快 跟不上你的嘴
分开我骗了谁 想擦掉你的脸
擦不掉痛 却更 明显
你说你要的世界 在很远 我不了解
分手就分手 别把 话说得太美 我像个残废 飞不出你的世界
借不到一点安慰 为什么你拼命后退
退到了边界 结果我没了知觉 就连痛都嫌浪费
在爱里残废 非弄得伤痕累累
累到我无力再追 最怕你突然要挽回
回到了原点 原点却又像终点 然后 多痛 一遍
爱你行动不变 追不上你的美
脚步再快 跟不上你的嘴
分开我骗了谁 想擦掉你的脸
擦不掉痛 却更 明显
你说你要的世界 在很远 我不了解
分手就分手 别把 话说得太美
我像个残废 飞不出你的世界
借不到一点安慰 为什么你拼命后退
退到了边界 结果我没了知觉 就连痛都嫌浪费
在爱里残废 非弄得伤痕累累
累到我无力再追 最怕你突然要挽回
回到了原点 原点却又像终点 然后 多痛 一遍
我像个残废 飞不出你的世界
借不到一点安慰 为什么你拼命后退
退到了边界 结果我没了知觉 就连痛都嫌浪费
在爱里残废 非弄得伤痕累累
累到我无力再追 最怕你突然要挽回
回到了原点 原点却又像终点 然后 多痛 一遍
我像个残废 在爱里残废
i'd thought we were so strong, we've been through so much.
and we still made it through together.
i'd thought nothing could break us.
now i feel this hurt would never go away.
i looked forward to your call.
but you werent feeling well. disappointment.
scroll down and read the last entry on this page.
all the memories flood back and i break down.
thats the end of my first love.
i hate vjc girls.
what we could have been, 01:41.
Saturday, March 03, 2007
my angel flew away.
god took him back to be someone else's.
that sentence doesnt mean im christian.
my pillar of hope is gone.
why was i so stupid to only regret now.
ive never really been very smart to begin with.
how do i live without you
pls dont withdraw so fast.
im gonna stop blogging after this.
i hate blogs.
everything around me reminds me of you
it makes it many times harder to get over you
god took him back to be someone else's.
that sentence doesnt mean im christian.
my pillar of hope is gone.
why was i so stupid to only regret now.
ive never really been very smart to begin with.
how do i live without you
pls dont withdraw so fast.
im gonna stop blogging after this.
i hate blogs.
everything around me reminds me of you
it makes it many times harder to get over you
what we could have been, 01:09.
Thursday, March 01, 2007
i soo love that quan character! ah.
you know in that 7pm ella show. haha.
he's really kinda like, so super cute.
i didnt eat the whole day!
hahaha. if i continue long enough,
i'd actually lose weight!
the wonders of staying home all day.
you know in that 7pm ella show. haha.
he's really kinda like, so super cute.
i didnt eat the whole day!
hahaha. if i continue long enough,
i'd actually lose weight!
the wonders of staying home all day.
what we could have been, 04:49.
